In this special episode of We Get It Your Dad Died, host Margy Feldhuhn continues her conversation with Brandi Bernoskie.
If you haven’t listened to episode 3, go back and check that episode out! After Margy and Brandi stopped recording, they couldn’t stop talking so they decided to record a Part II.
This episode focuses on the grief experienced when losing a pet. After Brandi’s mother passed, Brandi also lost her cat of 16 years, Hugo. Even though Brandi knew she would likely outlive her cat, it didn’t make the process any easier. Hugo became very sick, and Brandi had to syringe feed him to keep him alive. After Hugo passed, Brandi experienced incredible heartbreak.
Hugo was Brandi’s soulmate. He was with Brandi through the most confusing times of her life, through abusive relationships, and through the difficulty of starting a business. The only constant in Brandi’s life was Hugo’s love.
Losing Hugo was the greatest heartbreak of Brandi’s life. The loss of Hugo was particularly hard because Brandi had just lost her mom. Brandi didn’t have her best friend, her mom, to comfort her. Without Hugo, Brandi’s days feel emptier, and it reminds her of the emptiness she experienced losing her mom.
Brandi explains that when that love you experienced was unconditional, you process that grief entirely differently. She felt like she had time to process and grieve her mother while she was sick. However, Hugo’s death happened so quickly she didn’t feel like she had that time.
Brandi and Margy talk about how positive events in your life can still trigger the trauma and grief from loss. Margy recently got engaged and realized that when you hit a big milestone that is supposed to be a happy event, you can get hit with all the feelings of wishing your loved one could be with you to experience it. Ultimately, Margy and Brandi have found healing in feeling their emotions and telling their stories. The goal of this podcast is to create a safe space for people to feel those emotions connected to loss and grief and talk through them.
You can connect with Brandi on Instagram @brandibernoskie .